Paediatric Pearls

Things I have learned so far in kiddies ED:

  1. Bubbles have magical qualities and fix tachycardias ALMOST every time.
  2. There is no such thing as a “quick look” at a child in triage.
  3. Play specialists = HEROES.
  4. Early ametop application in triage is one of life’s greatest gifts.
  5. ALWAYS take a second cap gas because the machine demands one as a sacrifice.
  6. Sometimes kids just get rashes, and we don’t know why.
  7. All children in London are constipated.
  8. Parents never give paracetamol, for fear of us not believing that their child was in pain/hot. We berate them for it, and then don’t believe them that their child was hot at home if they aren’t hot here.
  9. I can now identify which antibiotics someone has been given based on what colour it is, what it tastes like, and what bottle it comes in.
  10. Suctioning bronchy babies and watching them instantly perk up before your eyes is one of life’s great pleasures.
  11. Sometimes a sympathetic face and time to listen is all it takes. Parents’ scope to worry about their children knows no bounds, and reassurance costs nothing. Be patient.
  12. A good number of midwives scales are broken.
  13. If the umbilical cord looks infected, it usually isn’t. When it is, it is a BIG deal.
  14. Getting a line into a 1 day old baby gives you the best high.
  15. Paramedics and GP surgeries NEVER have paediatric sats probes and this frustration will be felt DAILY.
  16. When you get cocky about your abilities you will inevitably do something insanely stupid like glue a child’s eye shut.
  17. When you finally know the doses for paracetamol and ibuprofen without looking them up you feel like a GOD.
  18. SOME babies ARE cute, and you have to remember to give them back to their parents when you are finished examining them.

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